Suck My Balls, Kyle
by djsrocks
Summary: Kyle and Cartman love each other, but they can't admit it to another. Kyle can't admit his feelings to anyone and can barely even admit the feelings to himself. Cartman won't admit his feelings to anyone but himself. They both want one thing. For Kyle to suck Cartman's balls.
1. Chapter 1

**Suck My Balls, Kyle**

**Chapter One**

_**Omniscient POV **_

"Suck my balls, Kyle."

Those worse haunted Kyle in every waking moment – ever since he was a small kid. 8 years old is when Cartman first told him to "suck his balls," and ever since then, they're relationship has been different.

Kyle was terrified to walk anywhere near the boy, for fear of the butterflies that sporadically flopped around in his tummy and his heart flying into his throat. He recognized the feelings as what his best friend Stan got when he was around Wendy. He knew he hated everything Cartman called him; stupid Jew, fag, everything. He continuously told himself he hated Cartman and everything about him. He hated feeling this way about the stupid fat ass. He hated feeling so amazing and thrilled from just being around the fucking fat ass that annoyed everyone and hated everyone – especially him.

Cartman knew he loved the stupid fucking Jew, and that's why he picked on him the most. He wanted to make everyone else think he hated the Jew. He needed people to believe he wasn't a fag. The only reference to his feelings where him saying "suck my balls," but it's not like anyone even realized what was going on in his mind. They just blew it off as the crazy fat ass's fucked up mindset coming through to fuck with them all. Yeah, even Kyle figured that was the reason. But Cartman knew the truth; he knew that he loved the stupid Jew with everything in him. He was just too afraid to admit it.

But one day, one meeting, one conversation will change everything for the two, now in South Park High School, boys.

_**Kyle's POV**_

Kyle was sitting in his desk, right after a meeting with the fat ass he was so desperately in love with, though he hadn't admitted it to anyone, ever – not even his best friend, Stan. No one knew, and he was grateful for that. What would people think? How would they react to the Jew also being a fag? Kyle let out a sigh and continued staring at the board, not really paying attention to Mr. Mackey, who was giving them their annual speech on how "drugs and alcohol are bad, m'kay?" He couldn't really pay attention though, and it's not like they didn't already know all of this, since they learned it every damn year.

He closed his eyes and envisioned the previous meeting with the fat ass.

"_You're a stupid Jew, Kyle," Cartman spat._

"_Fat ass," retaliated Kyle._

"_Suck my balls, Kyle," said Cartman gingerly. Kyle's face flushed slightly, though no one noticed. He blinked a few times before scoffing and looking at Stan to avoid paying attention to the pressure against his pants. His heart was beating faster and his palms were sweating a little._

"_Dude, what's wrong with you?" Stan whispered in Kyle's ear._

"_It's nothing, just not feeling the best," Kyle responded._

"_You're never feeling good around Cartman, dude. Does he really make you that mad?" Stan asked, his voice laced with a mocking tone._

"_He just… irks me. Leave it alone, Stan," Kyle said._

"_He irks everyone. You're the only one that responds this way," remarked Stan._

"_Leave it be," Kyle snapped. Stan shrugged his shoulders and shook his head._

"_Fine, but when you're ready to tell me what's wrong, come talk to me then," Stan muttered, anger drenching every word. Kyle closed his eyes. _

"_Jew, what's going on with your boyfriend, fag?" Cartman asked. He laughed and glared at the Jew. _

"_Nothing. Fucking leave me alone fat ass." Kyle shoved passed Cartman, enjoying the tingling sensation in the area of skin that had touched Cartman. _

"_Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you?" Cartman asked with a sliver of humanity coursing through his words._

"_Fat ass, leave me the fuck alone!" Kyle sighed, trying to keep in the joy he had at talking to Cartman. Being near him… it made him feel alive, real. He took a deep breath and stared directly into Cartman's eyes. "Cartman, fuck off, okay? I am not in the mood for your Jew-hating, fat ass. You ruin everyone's days, and even some people's lives. You have no idea what you do to people and you just go around acting like you're all high and mighty, when in reality, you're just a mean, ignorant, fat ass! Get over yourself!" Kyle sighed. His eyes were stinging with tears he was holding back._

"_What do I do to people?" Cartman asked with a smirk on his face. Kyle froze. He came up with a lie almost instantly._

"_You piss people off. All the time. All you do is piss people off and discriminate against them. Get over yourself," Kyle snapped. Cartman _

_Cartman laughed. "Fuck you, Jew. You're so damn stupid." With that, Cartman walked off towards his next class, saluting Kyle with a finger._

Kyle sighed happily, as weird as the might seem. His weird, abusive relationship with Cartman was the most excruciatingly happiness-bringing thing in the world, especially when Cartman asked him to suck his balls. Oh how bad he wanted to suck Cartman's balls, but that would be such a faggy thing to do - not that loving the racist idiot isn't a faggy thing to do, but he didn't want to be more of a homosexual then he already was.

He wanted to be able to suck Cartman's balls, no matter how much he denied it.

And he had no one to talk to.

_**Cartman's POV**_

Cartman was wondering what the hell was wrong with the Jew. He sat there and thought back on what happened with Kyle.

"_You're a stupid Jew, Kyle," Cartman spat._

"_Fat ass," retaliated Kyle._

"_Suck my balls, Kyle," said Cartman gingerly. Oh how badly did Cartman want Kyle to do that. The Jew went and had a soft conversation with his stupid best friend that always left Cartman jealous. He saw Stan walk away with an angry look in his eyes._

"_Jew, what's going on with your boyfriend, fag?" Cartman asked. He laughed and glared at the Jew. _

"_Nothing. Fucking leave me alone fat ass." Kyle shoved passed Cartman. _

"_Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you?" Cartman asked with a sliver of humanity coursing through his words._

"_Fat ass, leave me the fuck alone!" Kyle sighed and stayed quiet for a little before staring right into Cartman's eyes. "Cartman, fuck off, okay? I am not in the mood for your Jew-hating, fat ass. You ruin everyone's days, and even some people's lives. You have no idea what you do to people and you just go around acting like you're all high and mighty, when in reality, you're just a mean, ignorant, fat ass! Get over yourself!" Kyle sighed again, leaving Cartman wondering what the fuck was going on._

"_What do I do to people?" Cartman asked with a smirk on his face. Kyle froze, which made Cartman laugh softly, wondering what was going on in the adorable Jew's mind._

"_You piss people off. All the time. All you do is piss people off and discriminate against them. Get over yourself," Kyle snapped._

_Cartman laughed. "Fuck you, Jew. You're so damn stupid." With that, Cartman walked off towards his next class, saluting Kyle with a finger, loving everything about the adorable Jew that was left speechless behind him._

Cartman smirked, loving that Kyle would never understand why he played all these little jokes with him, called him a Jew, and made fun of him every minute he got. He got off from seeing the Jew squirming and his frustration. He loved everything about the Jew-boy that had grown since they were little.

The fat ass was extremely proud of himself for making everyone, even the Jew, believe that he hated Kyle Broflovski, when, in fact, he was madly in love with the boy. Yes, Eric Cartman was a homosexual - a major flaming homosexual in love with a Jewish straight boy. Well, in all actuality, he didn't know if the Jewish boy was straight or not, but he needed to believe that, or he might actually try and fuck the boys brains out. He might do that anyways, but… he chose to believe as long as the boy was straight he would not touch him.

Cartman never paid attention in class, but this time he tried to at least play some attention so his mind would focus on the daywalker's firm ass. He crossed his legs and tried to stop the growing erection. He sighed and paid more attention to the teacher, but got bored too quickly with the lesson.

He envisioned the Jew sitting there, in front of him. He never wanted to leave the Jewish daywalker's side, but he knew that it would be wrong. He couldn't love him, since in all honesty, he hated Jewish people – all Jewish people except for Kyle. It annoyed him. It pissed him off. He also hated all gingers.

What was it about that damn Jew that he loved so much? How could that little fucker make him fall in love, when he swore that he would never ever love someone that was Jewish, ginger, or anything else he hated. But he went and did it. He went and fell in love with him.

He ruined his life falling in love with that boy.

He also hated how bad he wanted Kyle to suck his balls. Ever since they were little he wanted Kyle to suck his balls and he would do anything for that to happen, but he had to make sure that no one thought it was for his own personal enjoyment, that it was to annoy the other boy.

He had to have Kyle suck his balls and he was prepared to do anything for it.

Even admit to loving Kyle.

_A.N. Meh, I don't know if this is any good. The plot should start to grow within the next couple chapters._

_This is my second South Park fic._

_And again, it's sexual and for a pairing I don't ship._

_Which obviously means I'm going to start shipping CartmanxKyle._

_I really hope you liked this._

_Should I even keep this story? Should I continue writing?_

_Drop a review with your critic?_


	2. Chapter 2

**Suck My Balls Kyle**

_**Kyle's POV**_

Kyle stood up and walked into the next classroom, his hand twitching some. His thoughts had been focused on the fat ass for the entire class period. This was getting too out of hand… he couldn't even focus in class anymore. Something needs to be done about it.

'Kyle..?" he heard someone call out. He turned around and saw Stan standing there, a little sheepish.

"Yeah, what do you want?" he snapped.

"I wanted to apologize. If you want to tell me something, you can tell me when you're ready," Stan said with an apologetic tone.

"Thanks for getting that through your head." Kyle smiled. "You should really learn to stop trying to force yourself into my only secret."

"Well, you're my super-mega-best friend. I hate that you are hiding stuff from me. I've let you completely into my life," Stan said.

"Have you told me everything?" Kyle asked.

"Y-yeah, well mostly. I mean, I've told you everything that's important."

"Well, importance can vary between people. You should just tell me you're secrets."

"Don't put this on me! Yours is obviously affecting you! I need you to tell me. I can't stand to see you in pain. I really miss being close, and this is tearing us apart. Please, just tell me, Kyle," Stan begged. Kyle bit his lip and wondered about how he could tell Stan without it affecting their friendship. He didn't want to anger Stan by not telling him, but he really just wanted to tell _someone_. It was so hard for him to continue to keep it to himself, but he couldn't deal with telling anyone about him insane crush on the fat ass.

Speak of the devil. Cartman rounded the corner with that damn smirk on his face. "Look, Stan, I'll tell you when we hang out tonight, okay?" Kyle muttered as Cartman came over. "Leave it be." Cartman came over and pushed Kyle away from Stan so that they Kyle was up against a locker and Cartman had his hand pushed up against the locker.

"Cartman what the fuck are you doing?" Kyle asked. He was freaking out form how sexual this position was.

"Meet me outside of my house after school. Don't be late, got it?" Cartman sneered. Kyle nodded and looked into to fat asses eyes, loving them. Their eyes stayed locked for a moment, but Cartman quickly pulled back and walked off, leaving the Jew stunned.

_**Cartman's POV**_

That damn Jew was always, always, always talking to his stupid friend. It pissed off Cartman. It rubbed him in such a wrong way. He took a deep breath and walked over to the Jew and pushed him against the locker. His eyes scanned Kyle's body, very happy with the view.

"Cartman what the fuck are you doing?" Kyle asked.

"Meet me outside of my house after school. Don't be late, got it?" Cartman sneered. He loved staring into Kyle's bright green eyes. He looked into them for a few moments, but then stormed off and walked away coolly. He smirked at the fact that he was going to finally get Kyle to suck his balls. This way had to work.

He was going to admit to Kyle that he loved him, and if Kyle didn't love him back, he was going to make Kyle fall for him. It was the perfect plan, because who wouldn't love him? It made him shiver with joy. He would be his deceitful self and just win the boy's heart over. He knew he could do it.

Cartman strutted out of the school building, needing to get his house ready for Kyle to come over so he can win the Jew's heart.

_**Kyle's POV**_

Kyle was freaking out. His hands were shaking, he was twitching, and his heart was beating ten times faster. Cartman told him to go to his house. He was going to Cartman's house.

He was going to Cartman's house.

Stan and he were sitting in free period together. There was this period, which was almost over, and then the last period of the day before he could go. He felt someone starting at him so he turned towards where he felt it.

Stan was staring at him and giving him a weird look that Kyle couldn't quite understand. "What do you want, Stan?"

"What's going on between you and fat ass?"

"Oh, I don't know. There's something wrong with him."

"But you seemed so happy when he pushed you up against the locker!"

"Um, I wasn't. I just…"

"No, you were obviously happy."

"Stan, just shut up!"

"No, just tell me what's going on! You have been hiding stuff from me for too long! We are super-mega-best friends. Fucking tell me."

"Stan, please. Just leave me be."

"Dude, you just told me to leave you alone. What kind of best friend does that?"

"It's just… I can't deal with this. Please… don't try and stop me from this. I have to."

"Um, Kyle, what are you talking about?"

Kyle stayed quiet for a moment and went over what he just said, realizing it sounded quite suicidal. "No, no, you idiot! I'm not going to kill myself."

"Then why did you say that!"

"Because! There is something I have to do. Something for me that will help me fix my problems."

"Fine. I just don't see why you won't tell me!"

"Well, didn't you say you weren't going to push anymore!"

"Well, there is obviously something wrong with you! I'm not going to sit back and let you kill yourself!"

"I'm not going to kill myself."

"Please… just tell me what's going on."

"Fine. Fine! FINE, STAN, FINE! I'll fucking tell you what's going. You wanna know what's wrong with me? You really wanna know!"

"…Yes…"

"I'm gay."

Stan was quiet for a moment. He stared at Kyle and then looked away.

"I knew you wouldn't be able to handle it. Just, leave me alone, Stan."

"No, Kyle, don't be like that. Please, don't leave me again. You always leave and shut down. Not this time. I need you as my friend. You can't leave me again."

"Stan, what are you talking about?"

"You leave me all the time. Well, I guess I leave you too, but dammit, Kyle. I don't care that you're gay. It doesn't matter. I could care less. You're my best friend. Okay?"

Kyle smiled, but all he could think about was all the struggles their relationship had been under. It made him feel like shit. He never realized how shitty their friendship was. How bi-polar it was. They could never just be friends without something screwing it up. And he needed their relationship to be stable.

"Stan… why can't we just be friends? Why are we always fighting and are friendship ending? Why does it seem like there is always something getting in the way of our friendship?" he asked. His voice cracked and there were tears forming in his eyes.

"Kyle…" Stan started, "I don't know. But I swear, this time I won't let our friendship die. I love you, bro. You're my best friend. And I need you here with me. Y'know? Dude, this isn't going to ruin our friendship. The only thing that could do that is if you where in love with Cartman!" Stan laughed. Kyle nervously laughed, somewhat scared.

If only Stan knew…

_A.N. This chapter is done. Is it any good? Whatever. I was going to have the meeting in this chapter, but this felt like a good way to end it. The next chapter will be the two's meeting. It will be… something special. :D _

_Drop a review, if you so please._


	3. Chapter 3

**Suck My Balls, Kyle**

**Chapter Three**

**Cartman's POV**

Cartman was pacing back and forth outside his house. He'd skipped the last class of the day to prepare for Kyle to come over this afternoon. His heart was soaring at the very idea of Kyle coming over and the plan he'd concocted. He could only hope that this would work, that Kyle would love him back. If he didn't, this would all fall to shambles and he'd not only be called a fatass, but a fag as well. He chose to not think of that outcome.

He practiced what he was going to say over and over again in his mind until the words were imprinted on the inside of his eye lids. He knew it so well it seemed like those we're going to be the only words he'd ever say again. He took a deep breath and looked at the clock. School had gotten out about ten minutes ago, which means that Kyle should be here any minute…

**Kyle's POV**

Kyle pushed the doors of the school building and stormed off in the direction of Cartman's house, not wanting to waste on precious moment with the fatass he loved so dearly. He couldn't believe Cartman had invited just him over, and the way he'd done it… He could still feel Cartman's body pressed up against his own. He continued to push himself farther making sure he'd reach Cartman's house in record time.

As he neared the house, he thought of what Cartman was going to look like, what he would say, what would happen? He was scared, nervous, but insanely happy at the same time. He shook his head and he walked up towards his house.

He walked up the driveway, up the walkway, and right up to the door. He stood there for a few moments before ringing the doorbell and waiting for Cartman to open the door.

**Cartman's POV**

The doorbell rang and Cartman jumped at the noise. Emotions were catching in his throat and he could feel a bead of sweat dribble down his face as he opened the door and saw the Ginger Jersey Jew standing in front of him.

"Are you going to let me in or not, fatass?" Kyle sneered, but with less anger in his voice than usual. Cartman knew something was up, but he couldn't quite catch what the other emotion was in Kyle's voice. Fear, maybe, but he wasn't sure. He side-stepped and let Kyle into his house, smiling to himself at the adorable look on Kyle's face. It was a look of confusion, fear, and downright ignorance as to what Cartman hoped was going to happen, but again, there was an emotion he couldn't quite understand on Kyle's face.

"Kyle, I –"

"What do you want? You tell me to come to your house after school, and I'm not waiting! Either you tell me now or I'm leaving!" Kyle stated. Cartman froze for a moment at Kyle's words, but he snapped out of it when he saw Kyle turning to walk away. Cartman grabbed Kyle's arm and pulled him closer. A slight blush formed on Kyle's face and Cartman pondered why that adorable blush was there.

"Look, Kyle, I wanted to… ask you something," Cartman muttered.

"Just ask," Kyle said.

"W-will you, uh, suck my balls?" Cartman asked. Kyle's face twisted into anger and he pulled himself away from Cartman.

"You seriously expect me to seriously answer that question? Are you kidding me! You fucking retarded piece of shit!" Kyle screamed. Cartman blinked a few times before grabbing Kyle by the shoulders and forcing Kyle to look him in the eyes.

"I asked you this, because I love you," Cartman said, annunciating every syllable slowly and loudly so that it got into Kyle's head. Kyle stood there for a moment, face blank and expressionless. Cartman looked at him, his heart racing and his mind picking at every little feature of Kyle's face, loving this moment he got to see Kyle.

_**A.N. And I leave you with this… hehehehehe. I got this idea in the car with my father and brother while listening to Pink Floyd. I squealed "YES!" and thought they wouldn't hear over the music, but my dad stopped the car as we were pulling into the driveway and turned to look at me and asked "What?" I told him about how I got an idea for the next chapter of my story and I hadn't had an idea in FOREVER. He gave me a weird look and my brother told me I was insane. Oh well! :D I am happy with this chapter! Hope you enjoyed~**_


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